5 Keys to Give Grace
Photo by Annie Spratt
If you have followed us this month, we have explored grace and what it means to have been given this wonderful gift. We have discovered three types of grace – saving, strengthening, ministering grace.
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It has been enjoyable to discover how to receive this free gift and how it can be used. I am so thankful for the grace that has been given to me. However, I want to talk to you today about not just receiving grace but giving of grace.
Freely You Have Received, Freely Give
The scripture tells us in Matthew 10:8, “Freely you have received, freely give.” Isn’t’ that what the gospel is about? The priceless gifts we have received through Jesus aren’t for us to hoard and keep to ourselves. Yes, we are to enjoy them, but then give those same gifts to others, showing and telling them about Jesus.
Grace is no exception. We have been given grace to overcome obstacles that we would struggle with independently. Grace gives us what we need when we need it. I like to say that it is the “X” factor. Just like in an algebraic equation, the letter x stands in the place of whatever is missing. Well, grace does that for you and me. It stands in the gap of what we are missing and smooths things over!
The gift of grace is so wonderful, but how many times do we pray for more grace or for God to help us in some way? Yet when dealing with our neighbors, we are judgmental of their weaknesses. Jesus talked about this in a parable. He told a story of a king who had a servant who was in debt to him. He went to the servant and demanded that the debt be paid, but the servant begged for mercy because he couldn’t pay the debt. So, the king had compassion for him and released him from his obligation.
You would think that the servant would be so thankful and therefore treat others the way he was just treated. But instead, he turned around and demanded that a debt owed to him be paid immediately. When that person couldn’t pay, the servant had him put in jail. As you can imagine, when the king got news of what happened, he was not too happy about it. In fact, he had that servant not only jailed but tortured. Yikes!
Jesus told this parable to make the point that we are to extend and give to others what we have been so freely given.
Judge Less, Feel Better
Unfortunately, we often fall into the trap of judgment. We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions. However, we need to remember that if someone is acting ugly, something else is wrong – they are lacking something in their life. That is where we can offer grace. We can look beyond their shortcomings and faults – even the ugliness and simply provide grace.
I often think about Jesus’ words in Matthew 7:1-5 about judgment. He says in verse three, “And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?
We all fall short of the glory of God. Not one of us has this life figured out and is completely perfect. There was only one, and that was Jesus! So, if I can reference a saying from back in the day, take a chill pill when it comes to examining others. You will feel much better when you take your eyes off of others and put them where they’re supposed to be – on Jesus.
5 Keys to Give Grace
I would like to take credit for the keys I’m about to give you. However, they come from my study Bible (New Spirit-Filled Life Bible), and I thought they were too good not to share with you.
1. Practice instant reconciliation. Understand that conflicts cause much more significant damage to relationships when left unresolved. This means that there will be times when you are right, but you will need to make the concession to reconcile. Is it easy? Nope, not at all!
I remember working in a really tough job, and the staff that I worked with were even tougher! They purposefully did things to make my job even more difficult than it already was. So, one day I had enough and retaliated with some words that I had been holding back (for good reason). I knew I shouldn’t say anything, but I had had enough! I let it all out and instantly felt regret.
As I was praying about my situation, the Lord told me I had to ask them for forgiveness. What?! Me, ask them?! They were the ones being ugly day in and day out – why me? That’s when a still soft voice spoke to my heart, “you know better, they don’t.”
Well, I swallowed my pride and did as my Father God instructed me. The result was right out of Proverbs 25:21-22, “If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; for so you will heap coals of fire on his head, and the Lord will reward you.” Bottom line – take the higher road!
Because I was humble enough to ask for forgiveness, it did something in the spirit realm – diffused the situation. I was even able to lead a couple of the staff to the Lord, which was worth the humility of admitting I was wrong (even though what I said was justified).
2. Love by choice, not by circumstance. Agape love (the God kind of love) has nothing to do with what others do to deserve the love. It is a choice that we make, especially when it is difficult.
3. Remember to overcome evil through love. Like my story, I overcame the situation and the evil talk with love. In fact, that is what God spoke to my heart about the situation. “My love never fails.” (1 Cor. 13:8)
4. Understand that God forgives our sins as we forgive others who have sinned against us. Adopt the forgiveness of others into your prayer life as a daily discipline. (Mark 11:25) It is a very sobering thought that our prayers are hindered by unforgiveness. We should readily want to come to the throne of grace to ask forgiveness and to ask that any unforgiveness be revealed to our hearts.
5. Refrain from judging others. Remember that when we judge less, we will feel better. Whenever you find yourself critical of others, stop and examine why you feel the need to be critical.
6. Avoid striving for public recognition. Seek to walk in humility in every situation. Pride comes before the fall! You can be confident and humble at the same time. In fact, some of the most outstanding leaders are actually the most humble. Learn to prefer others and support others to succeed. Be the one who gives grace – helps someone or encourages someone when they need it.
This is what it means to give grace – to build someone up and help them on their journey. Part of your purpose is to strengthen those around you and offer your strength to cover their weakness.
We all have different gifts (graces) on our lives – things that we are good at, that even feel simple. It’s easy to be critical of others that don’t have your grace on them. Instead of being critical, be an encourager and offer your strengths to help their weaknesses. I want to challenge you to find ways to give grace to those in your life today.